Then There Was The Plot To Kill Me

Not All Who Wander Are Lost

In the previous post I mentioned we were house hunting. One of the reasons we were house hunting was because The Old Lady was knocked up. On "The Ranch" there were two houses. One built shortly after my grandparents bought the place almost a century ago and the other when my dad got married in the early 30s. Neither one had an ounce of insulation in them. One of my brothers took the second story off the big house. Even after lowering the roof it was damn near impossible to heat. The other one was the one we called The Little House. It was two rooms and would have been easier to heat, but consisted of only kitchen and bedroom and small rooms at that. And neither one had running water.

But this post is about the plot to kill me not housing. They say some women get crazy when they are pregnant and I can testify that it is true!! Something to do with hormones, I guess. During the later stages of the pregnancy The Old Lady was plotting ways to kill me. Have no idea why she wanted to kill me and probably she doesn't either. One of the ways she was thinking of killing me was by cutting the brake lines on my car. She was really pissed that her big stomach prevented her from getting under the car to cut the brake lines.

They say "A little knowledge is a dangerous thing", but in this case it was good. If she had known more about brake systems, she could have opened the hood and reached over the fender to cut the brake lines at the master cylinder.

Now if everyone followed this advice, they would all sleep alone!!!!!

And Then We Enveloped

Not All Who Wander Are Lost

In the fall we decided to get an apartment, by we I mean me, the former girl next door who came camping, and my cousin who didn't want to live with his parents after coming home from the military. We found a three bedroom apartment that was in town and pretty much conveniently located for all concerned. There were four of us living in the apartment, the aforementioned and the former girl next door's 3-year old daughter from a previous experiment.

Then in the middle of the winter the contract ended at the company where I worked and we went on strike. I guess the company figured we wouldn't want to be out in the cold for very long and they would get the best of the deal. Well, we weren't actually out in the cold. For picketing there was at least one RV trailer and there were several shacks built that had woodstoves, tables and chairs and even bunks. Some guys would sign up for night time picketing and just sleep in the picket shack. Some of the material to build the shacks came from the plant that we were striking. There was a pile of asphalt impregnated sheathing brought out to us from the plant, it was dunnage, pieces that had corners broken off or other damage and was usually used to protect the product in shipping.

Anywho, we ,the former girl next door and I, decided to live together. Because of the times and various other reasons we decided we couldn't just come out and say we were going to shack up. So we decided to pretend to get married. As I wasn't working at the time, we went down to Madison, WI for a few days and when we came back announced that we had eloped. Her 3 year old daughter told people that we had "enveloped"!!

And that's how the former girl next door became The Old Lady. Mostly because at the time a popular saying was "Dirty Old Men Need Love Too" and she would say "Dirty Old Ladies Need Love Too". So I started calling her The Old Lady and she calls me The S O. I guess the B is silent!!

Now that I'm older and have learned more about family history and history of my little hometown, I find it a little ironic that we were so paranoid about what people would think. Seems shacking up wasn't anything new and it seems with a lot of couples of the older generations the first kid could come at any time, but the rest usually took 9 months. (When The Kid was born at the end of the year I could see people counting on their fingers, but it had been a little over 10 months since we "enveloped".)